A Pome a Day for a Year

Maybe an apple a day,
does in fact prevent the medical professionals
from wanting to take any sort of examination
of your various bodily outputs.

What about other foodstuffs? How do they compare,
Perhaps,
Should you have a burger a day or even a beef stroganoff?
Is meat the key or is it fruits?

Tomatoes every day would probably turn
my old skin from puce to red
and make it seem as though
I am some kind of marathon peanut.

Which apple was it, anyway?
Granny Smith or Golden Delicious?
Pink lady or Crab?
That is the extent of my apple wisdom.

Gordon Ramsay would be most displeased.
However, the doctors,
watching me eat an orchard,
Seethe from the sidelines.